The Great Buffy Rewatch: Welcome to the Hellmouth, S. 1, E. 1

One of my goals since getting a DVD player (Blu-Ray) and Netflix is the opportunity to rewatch some of my favorite shows, such as Buffy. I should start with my first favorite show, Star Trek, but I'm confident that I can watch that with my children relatively soon. However, I'm pretty that the mature subject matter of Buffy means that I won't be able to watch that with them until at least a decade from now. 

Buffy is the first show after Star Trek that taught me what television could be. And I almost missed it. The title alone is not just a mouthful, but implies a bubbly cheerleader who must happens to slay vampires. It doesn't help that the show was preceded by a movie that received mixed reviews. It didn't sound promising and I had no interest. 

But there must not have been a whole lot on on Mondays, so I ended up watching a few episodes. To my surprise, I liked it. Then I moved to Illinois to live with my best friend. It turns out Buffy was her favorite show. Together we watched the fabulous second season, and I was quickly hooked. 

Why did Buffy make such an impression on me? Well, there's the snappy dialogue, the sharp acting, the mythology. But I think there's more to it, which I hope to explore further during the Great Buffy Rewatch. 

Let's get to it. 

Welcome to the Hellmouth Recap

The show opens at night in a dark high school, one which looks very similar to the one in Beverly Hill 90210 (because it is!). The music is eerie and suspenseful, and a sense of foreboding fills the air. The silence is broken by glass breaking. A former student has brought a naive young girl, supposedly to show her the view from the gym roof.

But she's skittish, and thinks she hears a sound. He soothes her, telling her it will all be alright. Yet, it's clear his plans for her are not in her best interest. She finally says she feels safe. Then it all changes. 

Because the boy is not the monster. The girl is. 

Next morning, a teenage girl is in bed, having a nightmare. She wakes up to a sense of foreboding. It turns out, she's Buffy Summers, and today is her first day of school at Sunnydale High School. Her mother asks her to try not to get kicked out of school. As she walks up the stairs, we meet Xander, who is doing a fine job swerving around the obstacles on his skateboard, until he spots Buffy.

We meet Willow, too. It's clear the two have been friends for a long time. Xander needs her help with math. They agree to meet in the library. 

Buffy meets Principal Flutie, who tears up her transcript. But something catches his eye, and she's then horrified to see him tape it up. Although he's still talking clean slate, he discusses her colorful transcript. It turns out she burned down the high school gym. She protests that he doesn't understand. The gym was full of vampires....asbestos. Oops. 

Buffy bumps into someone when she leaves Flutie's office, and the contents of her bag spill. Xander approaches and helps her gather her belongings. He tries to be witty, but utterly fails. Buffy walks off, leaving behind something. 

Buffy's in history class, and the teacher instructs the students to look at their text books. A surprisingly helpful Cordelia shares hers with Buffy, then offers to escort her to the library where she can find her own textbooks. On the way, Cordelia quizzes Buffy to determine her coolness factor. Buffy passes when she declares that John Tesh is the devil. 

On the way to the library, they run into Willow. Cordelia belittles Willow, telling Buffy that if she wants to succeed at school she needs to know her losers. She invites Buffy to the Bronze. Buffy watches Willow scurry away. 

Buffy meets Giles. When she mentions her name, he says he has just the book she needs. He pulls out an ancient tome titled "Vampyr", the same book she saw in her nightmare. She runs out of the library. 

The young man from the opening scene is found, quite dead. 

Buffy finds Willow at lunch. Willow expects to be bullied, but is pleased that Buffy wants to talk with her. Buffy asks about Giles. Willow reveals he's new, and that she thinks he's cool. 

Xander and Jesse join them, allowing Xander to return Buffy's stake. She explains that everyone in LA has one.  Cordelia comes up, stating she doesn't "want to interrupt your downward mobility", but gym has been canceled because of the corpse found in the locker room. Buffy's interest in this disturbs Cordelia. 

Buffy breaks into the locker room area and finds that the body indeed has two puncture wounds in the neck. She's angry, as she recognizes a vampire bite.She marches to the library to confront Giles. She tells him about the boy, then remarks that she doesn't care. But she stays, and Giles asks her questions about the body. She is angry, deflecting the conversation. She announces that she is the Slayer, and he announces he is her Watcher. But she says she's retired. Giles tells her that things are getting worse, and feels that there are signs of a "crucial mystical upheaval". Frustrated, they leave together. 

It turns out Xander is in the library, having heard the entire conversation.

Now we're underneath Sunnydale, and hear a voice intoning. It is a large vampire with a deep voice. He chants, "The sleeper will awaken. And the world will bleed. Amen."  

Buffy's trying to pick an outfit for the Bronze when her mother comes in. They talk a little, somewhat uncomfortably. Buffy agrees that all their problems are behind her, "I'm only hanging out with the living.  I mean, the lively - people."

As Buffy is walking to the Bronze, she senses someone is following her. A dark, mysterious, handsome man enters an alley. We see Buffy doing a handstand on an overhead pipe. She swings and knocks him down. He refuses to fight, and they talk. He tells her, "I don't bite"  He then adds, "Truth is, I thought you'd be taller. Or bigger." She tells him she wants to be left alone. He says, "You really think that's an option anymore? You're standing at the mouth of Hell. And it's about to open." He gives her a box, telling her she needs to be ready for "The Harvest". He leaves, and she opens the box to find a cross.

Buffy enters the Bronze, and embarrasses herself when she waves to someone waving at another person. She finds Willow, and they talk. Willow admits she has difficulty dating because she has difficulty talking. Buffy encourages her to seize the moment. She then spots Giles on the second floor. She excuses herself.

Giles is horrified at the mass of students at the Bronze, seeing it as a perfect breeding ground for vampires. Buffy mentions her encounter with the mysterious, good-looking man, but Giles doesn't know who he is. He asks her see if she can reach out with her mind and determine who on the dance floor is a vampire. She notes one, not because of an internal feeling, but because his clothes are out of style. She's casual about this, until she notes he's dancing with Willow, who was "Seizing the moment."

Meanwhile, we suffer through a conversation Cordelia is having with her friends. Jesse comes up to ask her to dance, but she treats him horribly.

Buffy fights the crowd to find Willow.  She goes to the alley, and grabs the first person who comes out an exit, pointing a stake at her. Sadly, it's Cordelia, followed by her posse. Cordelia is not interested in where Willow is. Buffy finds Giles and tells him she'll handle it.

Jesse is Bronze, chatting up the woman we say in the opening shot. She's flirting with him. She tells him her name is Darla.

We're now back underground, and the big vampire, Luke, watches as the Master rises from a pool of blood. He is weak. Luke tells him he'll be restored by the upcoming Harvest. He says he needs to eat, requesting something young.

Buffy meets Xander, asking him if he's seen Willow. He's impressed that Willow found a guy at the Bronze. Xander, seeing Buffy's concern, says, "I hope he's not a vampire. 'Cause then you'd have to slay him." He thinks she is delusional or joking. But seeing she's serious, he agrees to help her find Willow.

Willow and the vampire are at a mausoleum. Willow is increasingly nervous. He pushes her into the mausoleum. She announces she's going, but backs up into Darla. Darla's brought Jesse, who's bleeding at the neck. He thinks it's a hickey. Darla and the other vampire let their faces turn into monsters.

Suddenly, Buffy's in the mausoleum, letting off the one-liners she's famous for using when confronting vampires. She almost gracefully dusts the male vampire, startling Xander and Willow. Buffy tells Xander to take the others and go, and proceeds to fight Darla. For whatever reason she doesn't know that Buffy is the Slayer. 

Behind Buffy, Luke appears, grabbing her by the neck. Darla flees and we see Willow, Xander, and Jesse surrounded by vampires. Buffy fights Luke as he quotes his sacred text. He throws her into the crypt, then jumps in on top of her. Buffy's pinned.

TO BE CONTINUED!!!!

About the Episode

Aired on March 10, 1997 - ten years ago??? Welcome to the Hellmouth and The Harvest aired together, but I separated the entries.

My thoughts the first time I watched this: Well, true confessions: I didn't watch this the first time it aired. See my prejudices above. The first time I saw this was when FX aired it. Thus, I knew exactly who Darla was when she broke into the school with her victim. Oh, well. 

My thoughts now: Seeing the high school and listening to the opening credits made my heart sing. How I've missed you, Buffy. 

The opening scene says it all. We've seen it a million times, especially those of us who have seen too many Lifetime movies. The boy is going to have sex with the innocent blond girl. And if she refuses, well, he'll rape her. But as evil as his intentions might be, it turns out he's the innocent, probably never having met a vampire before. The sweet innocent blond turns into a vampire, and drains all the blood out of him. She then stuffs his body into a locker. 

That says just about everything you need to know about Joss Whedon's creation. He wanted to turn the tropes on their head, the tropes in which the pretty young blond is sacrificed to the horror movie villains. In the opening scene, the blond is not the victim but the villain, and a pretty horrible one at that. But even more important to Whedon, another young blond is not a victim either, she's the hero. It's her actions that save herself and her friends (and the world!) many times. Not your typical television or movie fare.

I always expect the first episodes of a series to be rocky as they try to settle on the correct tone, pacing, and characterization. This episode pretty much has all that established. The comedy with the horror are intermixed well, though the pacing a little rocky. The characterization is pretty good. Buffy is the reluctant heroine who just wants to be a regular high school student, while Giles is the stuffy British guy flummoxed by the world of American teenagers. Willow is terrified of her peers and tries to sink into the woodwork. Xander is a self-deprecating jokester.

Some of the special effects are ... well ... not so good. See the Master coming out of the pool of blood as an example. I'm also surprised that neither Darla nor Luke recognize that Buffy is the Slayer. 

The story makes clear how Xander first found out Buffy was a Slayer (and I love that he thought she was delusional or playing a game). Besides Giles, he was her first partner in Slaying, as he eagerly joined her in searching for Willow. I'm surprised she allowed him to help her. 

I did not remember that Cordelia was such a bully. Her treatment of Willow and Jesse is horrifying, and she would now be the poster child for the evils of bullying. I will be curious to see if her transition from horrible mean girl to full-fledged member of the team feels organic or forced. However, she always gets the best lines!

Angel doesn't get much to do, except stand around and look both creepy and mysterious. No evidence of either the brooding for which he is famous or the charisma that has made the actor a leading actor on not one but two shows. I know it'll come!

What we learned about Slaying: Let's quote Giles: "Into each generation a Slayer is born, one girl in all the world, a Chosen One, one born with the strength and skill to hunt the vampires, to stop the spread of their evil..." Slayers have prophetic dreams and are able to recognize vampires with their enhanced senses. 

What we learned about vampires: To create another vampire, the victim must suck the blood of the vampire. They look completely normal until they are about to feed, when they reveal their demonic visage. Some vampires are religious. Not all vampires recognize the Slayer.

What we learned about Sunnydale: Sunnydale was built on the Hellmouth (thanks Angel, for that bit of information). There's been a steady stream of fairly odd occurrences, according to Giles.

Body Count: Humans:  1 (the boy Darla ate); Vampires: 1, Thomas, dusted by Buffy.

What we learned about our characters:

Buffy was kicked out of her high school for burning down the school gym as she flushed out a vampire nest. She and her mother apparently moved to Sunnydale afterward to start over. Being a Slayer has cost Buffy quite a lot, including losing all her friends and having to fight for her life. Buffy is rather lazy with her Slayer powers, as she is unable to recognize a vampire using her Slayer-sense. Although she claims to be retired from Slaying, she carries a stake in her purse.

Willow and Xander have been friends for a very long time. Willow's feelings for Xander are much more romantic than his for her. Willow's mother apparently buys Willow's clothes for her, and they don't appear to fit very well. She is considered to be one of the smartest girls in the school. Xander, on the other hand, is really good on the skateboard (do we see him on that ever again?) who is not excelling at school and seeks Willow's help. 

Cordelia is the mean girl everyone went to high school with. She initially likes Buffy, mainly because Buffy was from LA, but Cordelia's opinion changed because of Buffy's association with Willow, Xander, and Jesse, Buffy's fascination with the corpse, and then Buffy's attempt to stake her. I really can't blame Cordelia for not wanting to be staked. We also learned that Cordelia's mother stays in bed all day and has been diagnosed with Epstein-Barr (which is not cool enough for Cordelia).

Giles is Buffy's Watcher, and he's new to the school. 

Best quotes:

Buffy: (when Xander returns her stake) Oh. No. That was for self defense. Everyone has them in L.A. Pepper spray is so passe.

Cordelia: I don’t want to interrupt your downward mobility. I just thought I’d tell you that you won’t be

meeting Coach Foster, the woman with chest hair, because gym has been canceled due to the
extreme dead guy in the locker.

Buffy: Prepares me for what? For getting kicked out of school? Losing all my friends? Having to spend

all my time fighting for my life and never getting to tell anyone because it might ‘endanger’

them? Go ahead. Prepare me. 

Buffy: Come on. This is Sunnydale. How bad an evil can there be here?

Willow:  I think boys are more interested in a girl who can talk. 

Buffy: You really haven't been dating lately.

Cordelia (after nearly getting staked): God, what is your childhood trauma? 

Buffy (in response to Darla asking who she is): Wow, you mean there’s actually somebody around here who doesn't know already? That’s a relief. I’m telling you, having a secret identity in this town is a job of work.

Fan Alerts:

I may have a special page about the activities of the main cast. Instead, I'll provide fan alerts for  those who are guest stars on the episode on which they first appear.

24 Fan Alert and Six Feet Under Fan Alert - Eric Balfour, Jesse in Buffy, has been around for a long time, and has had many roles. You may remember him as Clare's druggie boyfriend on Six Feet Under and as Milo Pressman in 24.

Dexter Fan Alert and No Ordinary Family Fan Alert (no, no one was a fan of No Ordinary Family, but I did cover it in my blog...once). Julie Benz plays the criminally underused Darla (Whedon recognized this and resurrected Darla on the spin-off, Angel). Benz has has many roles, but I suspect she's most famous as Dexter's tragic wife, Rita. She also played a mom on the horrible No Ordinary Family. 

True Detective Ends

Did you love it? Or were you gnashing your teeth because so little was answered?

My guess is, if you hated the end of Lost and you hated the end of Battlestar Galactica (and not because they were ending), you hated True Detective.

Because the whole Yellow King and Carcosa turned out to be pretty unimportant. The focus of the finale was on the investigation and capture of the scary man with the scars on his face, and then the healing of our detectives. It turns out the story was not so much about the case, as about the two men who solved it, or at least, part of it.

Hart and Cohle finally worked together and so, were able to figure out who the scarred face with the green ears belonged to. We knew they were right because we'd been introduced to Childress and witnessed the depravity of his life. Cohle knew the moment they drove up to the compound. We were treated to the trip into Carcosa, an abandoned fort that has been used by the Tuttles and the Childresses for their murderous, rapacious impulses. Finally, that scene, with an injured Hart holding an injured Cohle, looking up to the helicopter spotlight. The men were saved.

At the hospital, Hart finally let down his guard in front of his ex-wife and estranged daughters, as tears fell down his face. Cohle entered a long coma in which he was washed over by his daughter's love. In a final discussion on darkness and light, it is Cohle, of all people, who realized that if he can see a little light in the world, then the light might be winning after all. So, together, they walk off the hospital grounds, with Cohle leaving nothing behind.

For me, it was just about as perfect as a finale can get. Watching the finale, I realized that Cohle was not the titular true detective. Nor, obviously, was Hart. It's only when they combined forces, truly became partners, that they became the true detective, capable of delving into secrets hidden by powerful forces.

The Yellow King? And Carcosa? Well, they were fun to hear about (I honestly had paid no attention to the terms when they were first introduced). But we never had enough information to really derive any answers that would be worthwhile of our time. Sure, they could have made Cohle into the Yellow King (or even Hart, for that matter). They could have had Hart's older daughter be murdered by Childress.

But how much better and more interesting to have the redemption of these men, as they caught a man who was quite skilled in perversion, but otherwise was nondescript and lowly. We spent a little time on him, as he talked to the desiccated remains of his father, "made flowers" with a woman who turned out to be his half-sister, and painted a school. It was only as he painted the school that my hair stood up. Which of these children, which of these teachers was his next victim? But we didn't need to spend too much time with him, and any more would have felt like we were being cheated of the real story.

True Detective was by no means perfect. But it was extremely well-done. Matthew McConaughey has already confirmed what we already knew: True Detective is meant to be an anthology series, with different actors and different settings. So, we won't see Hart or Cohle, ever again, which makes me very sad. I suspect we will also desperately miss the direction by Cary Fukunaga (I've not heard if he's attached to Season Two). But we will see more of the vision that Nic Pizzolatto has. I'll be there.

Who Knew? Evangeline Lilly and Elisabeth Rohm

Sometimes, an actor can surprise me, often for the better. Here's two that have, recently. 

Evangeline Lilly

Lilly had the dubious honor of playing Kate Austen on Lost. Kate was a great character at first, as the female center of the primary triangle with a mysterious past. Who didn't feel for her when it was revealed she killed her abusive stepfather?  But as her story unfolded, it became evident that her storyline was half-baked. She robs a bank to get a toy airplane? She marries and then leaves Nathan Fillion because she doesn't do taco night? It doesn't help that her inability to pick between Jack and Sawyer seemed more like wishy-washiness than anything else. 

It was hard to tell whether a different actress would have made Kate more bearable. Lilly's Kate was a mopey sad sack. After a while, the character became a deadweight. And having never seen Lilly in anything else, I had no idea whether it was the actress, the character or both.

So I was a little bemused to hear that Lilly was starring as an elf in the Hobbit movies. Would she drag down that bloated series too?

Our first clue was her appearance on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. She was actually funny! Amusing! What? Who was this woman? Where was she during Lost?

Then, we finally saw The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug.  She stars as Tauriel, the created-for-the-movie Chief of the Guards of the Elven King in Mirkwood. She and Legolas are colleagues and good friends. Together, they are formidable foes of Orcs. She becomes enamored of a dwarf, Kili, and abandons Legolas to heal Kili from his Orc-inflicted wounds. 

So, it reads as soap operish, but somehow it works, in large part because of the charm Lilly brings to the role. She's happy in her life, except when being manipulated by Thranduil (but who wouldn't be?), and loves what she does. She's powerful, she's strong, and she doesn't get people killed so she can get a toy airplane out of a bank safe deposit box. 

Who knew Evangeline Lilly can act?

Elisabeth Rohm

Another revelation in the movies comes from Elisabeth Rohm. 

I first came to know Rohm from her morose turn as Kate Lockley in Angel. The character was justifiably a sad, brooding woman, so I was happy for the actress when she got a role on the original Law & Order as the second chair for the District Attorney. I was actually still watching that show when she started. I tried really hard to like her, I did. But the woman was so flat-affected, so unable to express an emotion, that I decided she just couldn't act. I gave up on her, and the show, and basically forgot about her. 

Then, I saw American Hustle, a fabulous movie. Great acting, a tightly developed plot, and a fun premise. If you haven't seen it, I suggest you do. One of many characters I enjoyed was Jeremy Renner's wife, Dolly Polito. She was an over the top Italian woman who loved her husband and loved her life. She was loud and dynamic (and possibly shrill). Emotion and affect dripped out of her. She was a great character. And she seemed familiar. 

So imagine my shock when watching the credits to discover Dolly Polito was played by one-note Elisabeth Rohm. 

Who knew she could act? And good for her! Keep it up, Rohm. You've earned my respect, again. 

Lost Fan Alert - Evangeline Lilly was Kate Austen. Apparently her talents were wasted. 

Buffyverse Fan Alert - Elisabeth Rohm was perfectly fine as Kate Lockley, a potential love interest for Angel. 

And an extra....

Pushing Daisies Fan Alert - Ned's Lee Pace is weirdly warped as Thranduil, King of the Wood Elves in Mirkwood. Watch his scene with Tauriel. That elf has issues. 

True Detective

Tonight, you might be watching the Oscars; B and I will be watching this show. Yes, I know we could tape it or watch it On Demand tomorrow, but I can't wait to watch. I wanna throw a pair of three year-olds in bed and run downstairs to watch this. 

If you haven't seen this, get On Demand and binge, now. I'll wait for you. 

First, a confession. Although I've always thought Matthew McConaughey was a beautiful man, I also thought of him as more celebrity than actor. Part of this is due to his penchant for starring in mediocre to bad romantic comedies. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind an actor making a living in rom coms; everyone's got to eat. Just don't expect me to respect you. Especially if you don't rise above the bad scripts that are the source of most modern romantic comedies. 

My disdain for McConaughey had another root, however. See below. 

It doesn't help that for years I have detested Woody Harrelson. 

This show has radically altered my opinion of both men. 

This season of True Detective focuses on two Louisiana detectives. McConaughey plays the extremely damaged Rust Cohle while Harrelson plays his reluctant partner, Marty Hart. They've just become partners when they pick up a case that makes an impression on both of them. They seem to solve it, but years later, Cohle receives information that leads him to believe that more perps were involved, and more women and children are being murdered. He resumes his investigation, despite opposition from everyone, including Hart. Meanwhile, Hart's life is falling apart because of his self-destructive habits. 

There are a number of elements that elevates this far beyond your average procedural. There's the cinematography, lovingly directed by Carey Fukunaga. The six minute single take scene in which Rust and his hostage navigate a race riot in the projects to Marty's car is justifiably famous, but Fukunaga adds a movie-like quality, making the Louisiana bayous not just the setting but another character. 

The scripts by creator Nic Pizzolatto are fantastic. The lines he gives Rust are nothing short of brilliant. Here's an excellent example:

Rust Cohle: I know who I am. And after all these years, there's a victory in that.

And another:

Rust Cohle: I think about my daughter now, and what she was spared. Sometimes I feel grateful. The doctor said she didn't feel a thing; went straight into a coma. Then, somewhere in that blackness, she slipped off into another deeper kind. Isn't that a beautiful way to go out, painlessly as a happy child? Trouble with dying later is you've already grown up. The damage is done, it's too late.

And last:

Marty Hart: Can you imagine if people didn't believe, what things they'd get up to? 

Rust  Cohle: Exact same thing they do now, just out in the open. 

Marty Hart: Bull... shit. It'd be a fucking freak show of murder and debauchery, and you know it. 

Rust Cohle: If the only thing keeping a person decent is the expectation of divine reward, then, brother, that person is a piece of shit, and I'd like to get as many of them out in the open as possible.

But enough of that. What really separates this show is the caliber of acting. And it is indeed top-notch. McConaughey, still skinny from playing an AIDS-inflicted man in his Oscar-nominated role in Dallas Buyers Club, plays Cohle in three different time periods: 1995, 2002, and 2012. Each version is different. In 1995, Cohle is tightly controlled, his arms held close to his body, distant from the world around him. Seven years later, he's looser, more involved and affected by events. By 2012, he's a shell of a man, burned out. Each iteration is distinctly drawn and cannot be confused with the others. I hope McConaughey has cleared room on his mantle for an Emmy. 

I don't want to leave out Harrelson, either. McConaughey's is the tour-de-force performance, but the role is also written that way. Harrelson's character is a self-righteous jerk who has difficulty adhering to what he believes are the ways all men should behave. So, he cheats on his wife, beats up his mistress's one-night stand, and and treats the women in the life as set pieces. At times he seems genuinely remorseful, but also completely unable to change. 

Tonight we find out whether Rust or Marty are involved in the killings that have afflicted Louisiana. I really hope neither is,especially Rust. Even with his many flaws, I think that Rust might be one of the most decent men on television. But if he is, I suspect it will be a delight to explore. 

Intelligence

Oh, Intelligence. If only you wrote as good as you want to be.  

Intelligence centers around Josh Holloway as a decorated veteran who just happens to have a genetic defect that allows a chip to be implanted into his head. This chip allows him to access the internet and anything connected to it, which can be mighty handy.  Meghan Ory as his Secret Service guard, tasked with keeping Gabriel's inherent recklessness from getting him killed. Marg Helgenberger is the head of Cyber Command, of which Gabriel is an agent, charged to investigate episodes of cyberterrorism. Or something like that.

The problem with Intelligence is not its premise, which is about as far fetched as other shows, such as Chuck and Person of Interest. The problem has to do with the cardboard characters and the show's insistence in setting stakes too high too soon. In the first episode, the scientist who created the chip is kidnapped - high stakes, but who cares? In the second episode, the team is forced to deal with Gabriel's wife, a CIA agent turned terrorist. She's turned into a suicide bomber and dies In front of Gabriel.  In the next episode, a Chinese agent with a similar chip hacks into Gabriel's chip. 

So many things happens to Gabriel in the first three episodes, episodes that are supposed to make us feel for the pain he's experiencing. But we don't know Gabriel or his team enough to care. They haven't earned our empathy. They would have done better to follow the example of Person of Interest, the show it is most similar to. Show your heroes working their weekly cases, building up comaraderie amongst themselves, and with us. Then, when the stakes are high, when our heroes are brought to their knees, so are we. We care. We're as devastated as they are. Intelligence never gave us the time and opportunity to develop that relationship with their characters. 

The best part of the show is that it's a cornucopia of Fan Alerts. A lot of good actors are given work in this pedestrian show:

Lost Fan Alert - Josh Holloway is not the only alum who shows up. His character's wife is played by Zuleikha Robinson, Ilana herself. That really amused me, for some reason. Tania Raymonde, Ben's daughter, Alex, also makes an appearance as a murderous CIA agent. 

Once Upon a Time Fan Alert - Meghan Ory plays Ruby, aka Little Red Riding Hood, on OUAT. I think it's a little worrying that her character's been missing all season, and no one's said anything. What's that about?

Fringe Fan Alert - Is it me or is Lance Reddick everywhere these days? I'm not complaining. On Intelligence he's the secretive head of the CIA, but I keep expecting him to be called Lt. Broyles. And don't forget he too was on Lost as the mysterious Matthew Abaddon. 

BSG Fan Alert - Michael Trucco, Starbuck's husband Sam, also makes an appearance as a Secret Service agent who shares a past with Ory's Riley. 

The 4400 Fan Alert - I laugh as I write this, as Peter Coyote's been in everything. But his Dennis Ryland was in charge of the agency investigating The 4400.  Now he's Marg Helgenberger's father, and apparently in the president's administration. 

Life Goes On Fan Alert - Another laugh. Corky's dad, Bill Smitrovich, also makes an appearance. 

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine Fan Alert - Rosalind Chao played Keiko O'Brien, Miles's wife, on both Deep Space Nine and Next Generation. Here she played a Chinese diplomat.

Don't waste your time. Let's hope Intelligence dies an early death and Holloway finds a vehicle worthy of his talents. 

The Best of 2013

All the critics are creating their best-of-2013 lists, and while I'm no critic, I feel compelled to write up what my favorite shows of the year were.

But it's a funny list. Because I'm limiting it to shows that were first aired in 2013. One of my favorite shows I watched this year is Battlestar Galactica, which did not first air in 2013. So it doesn't belong on this list.

Another funny thing about this list. The critics' lists this year are teeming with shows from all types of distribution channels: pay channels, cable channels, networks, and now streaming channels. Sundance got into the episodic television series this year, with fantastic results. But I've not seen nearly as many of these shows as I would like. So while the critics (who, unlike me, are paid to watch television) had difficulty limiting their lists to ten or so, I could only come up with five.

Please understand that there are a lot of shows that might be on this list had I seen them (or in some cases seen the entire season). 

No ranking, because they are all great in their own way. I therefore submit in alphabetical order my best of 2013.

Broadchurch

If you haven't seen this yet, do so, now. Airing on BBC America, Broadchurch takes place in a small seaside village of the same name in England, and centers around two cops, an outcast detective played by Doctor Who's David Tennant and the woman who wanted the job he got. Tennant plays Alec Hardy, who's first day on the job puts him in charge of the investigation of a boy's death. Does this sound like any other procedural you ever saw? Well, the comparisons end there, because it is really a moody exploration of the effects of that death on the boy's family, the detectives, and the town. Small town secrets are revealed to devastating effects, and the town turns on one of its own in a witch hunt. The revelation of the killer is almost irrelevant when it comes, as families have been destroyed and friendships ruined. But there is also hope, and at the end, it is clear that the town will move on, stronger and better.

Broadchurch showcases some of the best acting this year, especially Tennant (who is now on "my list"), Olivia Colman as his reluctant colleague, and Jodie Whitaker, who's grief at her son's death is palpable. I'm a little concerned, though, because Broadchurch is a series, with a second season guaranteed. I'm not sure what next season will be. What also concerns me is that Fox is also remaking Broadchurch, with a different name and a different place (California), but with Tennant in the same role. The same producers are involved in both projects, so I will try to put aside my skepticism.

Game of Thrones

Word of warning about this show: do not, I repeat, do NOT get attached to any character in this show. You would think the viewing audience learned this in Season 1 when the head of Ned Stark was removed from his neck, but the Red Wedding proved that we may never be ready for George R.R. Martin's nihilistic fantasy epic. Game of Thrones is beautifully filmed, with numerous sets in numerous countries for the various different story lines. The plotting is usually tight and the costumes are delightful.

But none of that would matter if it weren't for the characters, who are  beautifully drawn and excellently acted. Why do you think it is so devastating when one of them dies? Tyrion Lannister, Brienne of Tarth, Arya Stark, and Tywin Lannister are among my favorites, with the Queen of Thornes, played by a transcendent Diana Rigg, being the newest to the pantheon.

It is easy to nitpick on Game of Thrones. However, it's one of the few shows that B and I both have to watch as soon as possible.

Orange is the New Black

If I had to pick one of these five shows as number one, this would be it. OITNB is not for the fainthearted; its depiction of violence and sexuality is brutally frank. It follows Piper Chapman, an upper-middle class, sheltered woman who finds herself behind bars. She enters prison and finds it has its own rules and culture, which she has difficulty understanding. She immediately offends the head cook, somehow acquires a girlfriend, and gets another prisoner sent to solitary.

But Chapman is actually the weakest link among a wealth of character riches. The breakout character is Crazy Eyes (you may have heard of a Caucasian celebrity dressing up as Crazy Eyes for Halloween, in full black face), who doesn't understand why everyone calls her Crazy Eyes. There's Taystee, who refuses to let prison bring her down, until she's released and realizes how little she has going for her in her on the outside. There's Miss Claudette, who's rumored to have killed someone but keeps her life neat and clutter-free. There's Yoga Jones, the soul of the prison, teaching yoga classes. I could go on - I love them all.

There are a few weak spots in OITNB, such as meth-head, anti-abortionist avenging angel Pennsatucky. But otherwise, this show is just about the best I've seen in a while.

Person of Interest

I know, surprising, right? Person of Interest? A network show? A procedural?

Well. Yes. I enjoyed POI's first two seasons, but it didn't really hit me until this year how much I really love it. Granted, I thought it's primary conceit of a machine that could essentially spy on us to detect terrorism was a bit paranoid. Everyone trying to get control of this machine for their own nefarious purposes seemed far fetched. I laughed and thought little of it.

Until Edward Snowden. Oh.

This season still has its weekly POI that must be protected by our heroes, but the story arcs have been tremendous. There's now a group of privacy terrorists (I laugh as I write that) who will do anything to destroy the machine and anyone who exploits it. But the corrupt cops and politicians that made up "HR" made the last three or four episodes into nail biters, culminating in the death of one of our heroes. Carter's death has unmoored Jim Cavaziel's John Reese, but has given Fusco moral clarity. (Ironically, the promos made it seem Fusco was the intended victim. Carter's death was truly shocking primarily because it was so unexpected).

I'm furious at the show right now, since it has left us on a cliff (I used words I probably shouldn't). But when it returns next year, I'll be there, on the edge of my seat to see how my heroes save themselves from this predicament.

Top of the Lake

Sundance entered the drama field with this and two other dramas, all three of which ended up on many critics best-of lists. I've only seen this one.

Directed by Jane Campion, Top of the Lake takes place in a part of New Zealand never seen by hobbits. It's isolated and peopled by rugged and solitary individuals. Like Broadchurch, the central storyline involves an unspeakable crime against a child, this time a pregnant twelve-year old. Elisabeth Moss stars as a Sydney detective in town to care for her ailing mother. She's called into service by David Wenham's Al to investigate the child's presumed rape.

Among the people she must investigate is the father of the girl, played to discomforting perfection by Peter Mullan. Also appearing is Holly Hunter as the cryptic leader of a commune of women, who are apparently trying to find themselves.

This mini-series is marked by stunning cinematography, moody scenes, and excellent acting. One of the central mysteries is pretty obvious well before it is revealed, but it hardly matters. Instead, we were on an exploration of the town as it's past is revealed and justice is explored. There are no easy answers, and a lot is left unclear, but the show is satisfying.

I want to give a shout-out to my favorite new network show:

Sleepy Hollow

Sleepy Hollow hit the ground running and hasn't stopped the crazy since. The show is marked by one of the best pairings ever in Tom Mison and Nicole Beharie.  I'm on the record as hoping they never set these up as romantic partners. 

Doctor Who Fan Alert - I've already mentioned David Tennant plays Alec Hardy in Broadchurch, and is expected to reprise his role in the Fox version.

Game of Thrones Fan Alert - David Bradley, the evil Walder Frey in Game of Thrones, plays Broadchurch's Jack Marshall, a storekeeper with ties to the murdered boy and a past.

LOTR Fan Alert - yes, that is Faramir you see in Top of the Lake.  David Wenham's Al has a way of making your skin crawl.

Lost Fan Alert - in case you've forgotten, Michael Emerson plays Harold Finch in Person of Interest. He became famous as Ben Linus. 

Mad Men Fan Alert - Elisabeth Moss, Peggy Olson, plays the Robin on Top of the Lake, demonstrating her acting skills, though her New Zealand accent was iffy, at best.

Star Trek: Voyager Fan Alert - Kate Mulgrew, Captain Janeway on Voyager, is nearly unrecognizable as Red, the domineering head chef in OITNB.

Intelligence

So, you may have heard of a little show coming on tonight, called Intelligence. It's about a cocky special agent who just happens to have a chip in his head. This chip lets him access everything online, including stuff that requires hacking. He has to be tightly monitored, because, of course, he's reckless, and likely to get himself killed. Why do they always put chips in guys like this?

It sounds kind of boring, doesn't it? Except for one thing:

The holder of the chip is played by Josh Holloway. You heard that right. Sawyer himself. This means I'll be watching. Maybe not tonight, since it is DVRed, but I will be watching, despite the middling reviews it has gotten. Because, you see, I miss seeing that face on television. And as I posted on my Lost blog, Holloway turned out to be a pretty good actor.

But I now have a question. Do I miss seeing Sawyer?

Or do I miss Josh Holloway? 

Well, we'll see. I'm sure I'll share my conclusions soon.

Lost Fan Alert: okay, really?